How to tackle lying

Instinctively we’ll know when our child(ren) are being untruthful about a sticky situation.

Do we continue to press home our point and relent only when they succumb to the pressure and own up or r to diffuse the building tension we choose to ignore the situation with the hope that better sense will prevail?

What I have observed with my son is that he becomes aggressive, the “no’s” only becoming vehemently stronger and the pitch becoming louder and louder. Conversely, there are kids who become completely docile and can be seen physically trembling with the fear of admonishment.

Not sure what approach is best, but maybe an over aggressive approach could be counter-productive. Depending upon the situation or the context behind the lie an offhand-ish yet stern approach helps to send the message home.

What have been your experiences and learning’s?

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7 thoughts on “How to tackle lying

  1. We can answer this, if we were to understand why children begin to tell lies? This is an acquired habit and is brought about by strict parenting! Sensitive parenting with good attitude towards listening to the child without commenting and interrupting will go a long way towards honest communications!

  2. Hi Rohit, i do agree its better to have a dialogue with the child and try and understand and make him realize what is the correct situation. On more point saying “NO” is not good for kids, as per an article i recently read on the net. An average toddler hears the word “no” an astonishing 400 times a day. kids who hear “no” too much have poorer language skills than children whose parents use more positive feedback. Plus, saying no can become ineffective when it’s overused.
    Eg: the kid says at a super market to you, “can i have a chocolate”. Instead of you saying “NO chocolate before lunch” , you can say ” YES, you can but after you have eaten lunch, but if you are hungry now lets go and look for an apple.”

  3. The situation, I believe, is an outcome of children getting scared that their parents may disapprove of certain actions. Open communication is the key. Helping your child understand the reason behind approval/disapproval of certain actions/ behavior. Understanding your child’s perspective to things and helping him/ her make the right choices, instead of forcing your opinion on them, usually takes parents places.

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